We were talking about our dad
When I realized how much you hated him, just as much as I hated our mom
I was indifferent about him, you were indifferent about her
How gullible of me thinking that you got along well with them just fine
“I always talk back at them, you know,” you said matter-of-factly
I had never bothered doing so. I always knew it was a futile move
But then it hit me that you were gutsy and I was just plain coward
I started to regret how little I knew about you
Your jovial soul
Your vivacious vibe
The life of the party
The center of the fun
And how I was none of that
There had never anything special about our relationship
We were never really close
Perhaps because I always put up a shield
Or that I didn’t care about other people
And their feelings
And what they like
And what they want
But you’re unlike me
You could almost always tell what people feel
And what they were thinking at any given time
I envied you and your transparent way of life
Simple and straightforward
Never enigmatic
Without hesitation
It’s raining now
It’s always raining during your birthday
You, the water bearer
How I wish I was more like you
And less myself